Adventures in Blog Templates

This is what happens when free WordPress accounts only let you pick from a small number of non-customizable blog formats. It seems that I’m sharing a style sheet with one Maurice Clarett, the tailback from Ohio State’s 2002 national championship team. He has not stepped foot on a gridiron since, however, after a series of academic and criminal misadventures that eventually led to his incarceration at Toledo Correctional Institution for robbery and weapons violations.
Yes … apparently Ohio’s prisons have Internet access. Who knew? Regardless, based on the postings, it seems it’s done him some good. Apparently he’ll be up for early release shortly — perhaps in time to restart his career.

Liveblogging the Non-SOTU SOTU

That’s “State of the Union” for the uninitiated. You’ll get updates once the Hope-monger gets rolling. In the mean time, today’s Dilbert strip pretty well captures the zeitgeist:

8:40: Yes, I’m still alive. Twitter, you see, is a very seductive mistress.

9:00: The cavalcade begins.

9:03: Nobody electrifies a room quite like the Supremes. No, not them. The black robe types.

9:05: Sec. Geithner arrives: the face that launched a billion sell orders.

9:11: And here we go. Obama starts working the crowd. Very. Slowly.

9:13: The meet and greet continues. Shelby, Hatch, Clinton, Roberts.

9:15: He brought manila envelopes! He’s such a cheapskate on gifts.

9:16: Okay, somebody didn’t rehearse. Maybe Obama just subconsciously makes everybody flub ceremonial pronouncements?

9:18: MSNBC broke out an annoying voter reaction meter doohickey. Somebody sure told him to be uplifting out of the gate, didn’t they?

9:20: Obama: To make myself look better, I’m gonna tell you everything that Dubya did wrong. And what a list it is.

9:23: He’s got an agenda! Who knew? In case you didn’t know what the party line in seating arrangements was, I guess you know now.

9:24: This “save or create” thing is a total CYA operation. In other news, it’d be great if the stimulus bill would actually do those things you just said.

9:25: Mitch McConnell may actually be a Jim Henson puppet.

9:26: “Nobody messes with Joe!” Damn straight, bitches.

9:27: The people MSNBC got for its ratings totally weren’t a representative sample. Their “Obama voters” only like his soaring rhetoric and they must have found the most liberal “McCain voters” they could. The latter are giving higher marks than the former.

9:28: Okay, here we go. Actual policy prescriptions. GOP sits inert, Dems cheer wildly. Wait … now, less inert. We already heard about the housing plan (which sounds suspiciously like a Ditech ad), but what was that consumer loan facility he was talking about back there?

9:30: Um … Richard Shelby fell asleep. Seriously?

9:31: “The cost of action will be great, but the costs of inaction would be greater.” Mmmph. Are you sure? Can we see your work there?

9:32: Some guy behind Sen. Specter was leafing through a program. Who knew those existed? Is there a Playbill for this thing?

9:33: Obama is slathering the populist rhetoric on pretty thick here, even for him. In other news, at least he can explain the multiplier effect accurately.

9:34: Some boos from the peanut gallery on a call for new regulation. Will he give us some specifics here?

9:35: Charlie Rangel may actually be dead.

9:36: The prez sees his budget as a vision … which is a pretty high bar to set for a phone book-sized bureaucratic monstrosity.

9:37: Obama: Remember all that awesome stuff government did before most of you were born? Well we can do it again — despite all evidence to the contrary!

9:38: Energy, health care, and education. Yeah, yeah, important stuff. Does Pelosi have a spring built into her chair or what? She is WAY too eager to jump up and applaud.

9:39: Well that’s great and all, man, but America doesn’t have a comparative advantage in manufacturing anymore. Get over it.

9:41: Oooh, the car industry is going to be “re-imagined”! Does that involve Steve Jobs? In other news, I don’t think we actually did invent the automobile.

9:43: Okay, but what IS health care reform? It seems to mean spending more money. (Lay off the Red Bull, Nancy.)

9:44: I think Obama’s getting frustrated. His soaring oratory doesn’t work so well when people want to give him a standing ovation every 30 seconds.

9:45: When did Teddy Roosevelt talk about health care? And does that mean that we’ll actually fix health care this year, or that this will be the last year of the American civilization? Because, honestly, that’s a coin flip in terms of plausibility.

9:46: Yeah. Education good. Got it.

9:47: Geez, again with the “reform.”

9:48: On being a HS dropout: “You’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on this country.” That’s … honestly creeping me out a little bit … kind of a propagandistic, totalitarian flourish.

9:49: Yeah, you’re on camera, Hatch. Wake up. So if you clean up a park, do you get a 90% off coupon for Harvard or what?

9:51: Now we see if Obama has any actual plans to reduce the deficit … or if he’s just gonna say it emptily. Damn, it’s nice to see some levity in these things. Bush and Clinton were so dour.

9:53: Wait … you’ve identified $2 trillion in savings? Really? Damn. Maybe you actually did do more than throw some lip service into this. Still nowhere near enough, but it’s something.

9:55: Yeah, that “no tax hikes under $250K/year” bit isn’t … entirely accurate. But really, if you’re not gonna suddenly eliminate social security or anything, you’re gonna need those taxes.

9:56: Obama gets some brownie points from me for not pulling crazy accounting tricks in the budget. Guess what: Six years in, Iraq isn’t still “emergency spending.”

9:58: Looks like he’s wrapping it up with the military stuff. He’s not putting his decision to set a 19-month timetable for withdrawal of combat troops from Iraq into this thing tonight, which is … strange.

9:59: Let’s not have vets starving and dying. Can we get on that?

10:00: It’s still sad that we have to make a big deal out of not torturing people. I mean, really, that’s kinda like your fire department expecting gratitude for not setting your house on fire.

10:02: Why the hell did they just cut to Sully?

10:03: Breaking News: Ayn Rand has just rolled over in her grave after hearing that story about the bank president.

10:05: Well played, random South Carolina girl.

10:06: See, Obama actually enjoys this job. That is an improvement — you got the sense that Dubya never really wanted to run the country and would have much preferred to just walk away from Washington in mid-2007 and never come back.

10:08: Alright then. Sappy, but a good finish.

10:10: Off to the media: Keith Olbermann is just going crazy with adulation, tapping the “crisis as opportunity” vein. David Gergen and John King are besides themselves with the scope of Obama’s ambition. Carl Cameron … previews Gov. Jindal’s response.

10:15: He’s freakin’ signing autographs!

10:18: Looking back to thoughts on FNC: Outside of O’Reilly/Hannity, they generally don’t come at you all-out with their bias. They’ll play issues straight, but choose very carefully what they will talk about, upgrading and downgrading the importance of things based on how they want to shape the news. Along with their ever-popular format of “Some people (i.e. everyone) believe X, but other people (who are completely discredited by everyone else) disagree! We’ll give it to you fair and balanced!” news pieces, they insidiously portray neutrality with a straight face.

10:20: Okay, enough negativity from Brit Hume. Let’s hear Rachel Maddow gush!

10:22: I guess we’re serious about energy conservation: Most of the lights in the House chamber are already out.

10:24: Um, the Governor’s Mansion in Louisiana is a plantation house? Does it still come with slaves? MSNBC can’t even disguise their disgust at Jindal, who … sounds way goofier than he did on Meet the Press two days ago. He’s talking to me like I’m in kindergarten.

10:26: Americans cannot do anything. I’m sorry, but no.

10:27: So you Republicans have got ideas, eh? Care to share them?

10:27: No, Bobby, not in the form of a story about Hurricane Katrina.

10:28: Yeah, you knew there was a bad “storm” metaphor out there.

10:29: Okay, a train from LA to Vegas and volcano monitoring systems seem like very good things to spend money on, compared with the alternatives. Will you quit it?

10:30: Tax cuts. Got it.

10:31: Is the GOP too poor to hire good writers?

10:32: I swear, if you say that line one more –

10:33: *sigh* I thought you were a thoughtful, principled conservative that I could respect. Not so much now.

10:34: You find hope in the American people, Bobby? Have you met some of us?

10:34: I really don’t think most of the GOP is as bothered by spending as its leaders are assuming that they are.

10:35: Did you really just try to say that Obama isn’t being hopeful enough, Bobby?

10:36: There’s your big 9/11 reference. You … really should stop that. And we are NOT the freest society on earth.

10:37: Okay. Thank goodness that’s over. Maddow is absolutely speechless and beside herself, it seems.

10:38: Over on FNC, even Krauthammer wasn’t impressed by Jindal, which should be like throwing a rock into the ocean from the beach. Chuckles tries to lower expectations and … talked about the nice room.

10:40: Well, I guess we now know how Democrats ended up in power. That … was stark. Good night, everybody.

Presidential Primetime Presser (Yay Alliteration!)

8:00: Lock and load. Let’s see what the kid’s got.

8:02: I guess they got some folks to show up for this thing. Incidentally, this is a wonderful pitch for the Elkhart Chamber of Commerce. Who knew Indiana was a Third World country?

8:03: I don’t think people disagree that this is a crisis, Barack. We’re not stupid. That doesn’t mean they can’t disagree about the means to fix it.

8:04: So is there some website I can hit up to figure out whether I actually benefit from any of those tax cuts you just listed?

8:06: Wait. Are you sure 90% of the jobs created by this thing (assuming they actually exist) will be in the private sector? Isn’t a huge chunk of this aid to state and local governments? Y’know, like those teachers and firefighters you just talked about. In a perfect world, you’d use the money to force municipal consolidation, but I doubt anyone has even suggested that to you.

8:07: Really? No earmarks? You may have … a very, very narrow definition of earmarks. Reassuringly, you are not proclaiming this bill to be infallible. Frighteningly, that means you’re basically throwing this out there on a wing and a prayer, aren’t you?

8:08: If we don’t sign this thing by Friday … the world explodes! (Or we just won’t have a bill for a while. Did you know Congress gets a full week off for Presidents’ Day? WTF?)

8:10: Anyone think he’ll get an A-Rod question? Obama now tries to walk the fine line between “OMG we’re all gonna die! Fix it fix it fix it!” and “Don’t lose confidence, consumers!” Quite messy.

8:12: Is the president actually tacitly acknowledging the existence of libertarians? Shocking.

8:13: Wait. We’re $1 trillion short in consumption demand? Damn. That’s … a lot.

8:14: We were going to have the Geithner plan today, but it was pushed back for some reason. Why didn’t he show up for this thing too? Maybe he doesn’t want Joe Six-Pack to watch that unveiling.

8:15: We totally won’t know if this plan “saved” any jobs … because they’ll still be there. Was that just a five-minute answer? Wow.

8:17: Alright, Iran. Obama: “Iran is a country.” Glad we cleared that up. He seems uncharacteristically halting and unbalanced in giving pretty routine talking points here, basically saying that he’s new and it’s gonna take a little while. I don’t think he thought they were going foreign policy on question #2.

8:19: He’s still going with this. At this pace, Obama may be followed by your late local news.

8:20: Chip Reid: Why haven’t you changed Washington in three weeks? I believed in hope!

8:21: Obama: But, little Chip, you’ve got to believe! … Right after I ramrod stimulus through.

8:23: There are good Republicans (Senators from Maine) and bad Republicans (everyone else).

8:24: The prez takes a good whack at the GOP for its fiscal responsibility being hypocritical.

8:25: You totally made it sound like retrofitting buildings will make money fall from the sky …

8:26: Apparently part of the stimulus involves handwriting training for doctors. Awesomeness.

8:27: Damn, South Carolina. You just can’t give that old school up, can you? Got that warm nostalgia for stuff that slavery built?

8:30: Obama tries to thread another needle: “People need to spend money now! But they need to save it! … Just not right now!”

8:32: Yeah, when we’re coming out of this, I’d love to see you impose fiscal austerity right before midterms. That will happen.

8:35: Obama: C’mon guys, I can’t spend more bailout money until I spend the bailout money I already have! I’m just a man!

8:37: Wait, crazy reporter dude, are you suggesting, um, accountability? Obama: What’ll it take to get you into an RV today?

8:38: It’ll be fixed when it’s fixed. You’re getting all Yogi Berra on us …

8:40: Oh, CNN man, don’t you look earnest. Are you suggesting we end both wars? That’s craziness! But that’s just prologue into his big question about the media blackout at the Dover AFB mortuary. Obama dodges.

8:42: Obama actually understands foreign policy nuance! I’m getting all warm and tingly.

8:44: We have to work “smartly and efficiently but consistently” in Afghanistan. What?

8:45: Obama hints we may actually make banks use bailout money for, y’know, loans.

8:46: Imagine that … the Fox News guy with the off-the-wall question. Obama seems to be doing okay with covering for crazy things Biden says. Get used to it, pal. He wraps up with a … crazy smile.

8:48: Ha! A-Rod question! Called it! Obama trots out the “Won’t somebody please think of the children!” angle in the least surprising moment of his presidency to date.

8:49: How in blazes is Helen Thomas still alive? (She’s 88!) And did she just say “so-called terrorists” in reference to Al-Qaeda? And did you really think that you could get Obama to publicly acknowledge Israel’s nuclear arsenal?

8:52: Obama tries to thread another needle. You’re going to infuriate your base or the GOP here … suffice it to say that some mid-level officials may be dragged in front of Congress, but Cheney isn’t going to the Hague anytime soon.

8:54: Jonathan Martin from Politico looks like a goof as Mara Liasson asks him about bipartisanship. Obama’s all, “I’m trying here, girl! For the people of Elkhart!”

8:56: We have a president that … learns … lessons? I’m not sure how to deal with that information.

8:58: Okay, wait, I zoned out for a minute. How did we get to charter schools? This is … kinda crazy.

9:00: Ideological blockage. I think they have a pill for that now. If you have an erection for four or more hours, please call your doctor. Peace.

Internet 1, Fraud 0

So I got a postcard today:

Well this sure does look suspicious, doesn’t it? No-name company with “good news” wants me to call them … Hm. There’s an address here. Enter Google Street View:

Oh, snap. “National Publishers – Earn Up To $30 Per Hour,” you say?

Yeah, that’s what I thought. FAIL, “F.R.C.” HA-ha! [/Nelson Muntz]

Because Someone Needs to Say It

Liveblogging the Super Bowl Post-Pregame Show

6:20: We’re getting down to crunch time here, people. The flight crew from US Airways 1549 just got what might be the wildest reception of the night and Jennifer Hudson is now butchering the national anthem. Did anyone from Arizona travel to see this game? This might as well count as a road game for the Cardinals. And yes, take a deep breath and realize that, seriously, THE ARIZONA CARDINALS ARE IN THE SUPER BOWL. AND I ACTUALLY PICKED THEM TO WIN. Cats and dogs living together, people.

6:22: Are you fucking serious? The economy is so bad that Americans’ best chance for career advancement is being an Avon lady? Wow.

6:24: Wow, NBC Monday night lineup. That’s … kinda depressing. And I do, totally, want a Hyundai Genesis.

6:28: I think people have seen a coin before, referee dude. And 12 straight NFC coin flip wins is very weird.

6:30: I guess Hines Ward is kind of a gamer … though I’m not sure how what was just described isn’t blood doping. Meanwhile, did the sideline reporter seriously just reference F. Scott Fitzgerald? I’m not sure whether to be excited or disturbed. And did you know that this is a special presentation of the National Football League? Who knew?

6:32: Neil Rackers, pending hero of the game (per my predictions), kicks it away. Let’s do it.

6:33: Well that’s not an inspiring start for the Arizona secondary. What the hell was that, man?

6:36: There’s the Arizona defense. Too bad they waited until Pittsburgh got to the one-yard line.

6:37: I seriously won’t be able to cope with a Steeler blowout win, as a native Clevelander …

6:38: Damn. Wait, are you sure he got in? That lineman totally pulled him in, if he did at all.

6:39: Alright, interesting challenge. And yeah … the “drinkability” campaign is BY FAR my least favorite current series of advertisements.

6:41: This Audi ad featured the exact same highway ramp as a VW ad. Because there’s not enough of those in America to be filmed, folks?

6:42: Hell yes. And what do the Steelers do? 4th and goal at the one foot line. I did not expect Tomlin to pansy out on me. 3-0, Steelers.

6:45: I’m not sure whether that Doritos ad was spectacular or horrible. Any thoughts, folks?

6:48: Nice catch by Breaston … and a holding call totally destroys any momentum. But if there’s any team that can convert 1st and 20 …

6:50: *gasps* And after that moment of panic, it looks like the Cardinals will just … slow down and play for field position. My goodness, this looks like a train wreck. Arizona looks so ridiculously out of phase. If Warner is jittery, then that whole team will have some issues.

6:52: Similar schizophrenic love-hate reaction to that Conan bit. How is he already hackneyed and played out before he even gets to take over Leno’s show?

6:53: NBC doesn’t know how many dimensions exist. Good job.

6:54: Santonio Holmes with another huge gain … and Cromartie bails the rest of his team out for the time being. Too bad there aren’t 11 of him.

6:56: John Madden seems way too surprised by a relatively standard dime formation.

6:57: What. The. Hell? How did that play happen? Kind of a poor man’s Manning-to-Tyree.  Pittsburgh follows that up with a poorly conceived direct snap to Willie Parker (the Wildcat is everywhere!).

6:59: Heath Miller just looks like he’s gliding through a bunch of children. Parker delivers another easy run straight through what is allegedly an NFL defense.

7:00: If Arizona can hold the Steelers to another field goal here, then I think we know Kurt Warner really does have a direct line to Jesus.

7:02: Who knew Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head had so many marital issues? And … you just take articles out of movie titles for sequels now?

7:03: Perhaps Ben Roethlisberger is less overrated than previously thought. That’s one hell of a stat line.

7:05: Probably not a bad time for a timeout. In other news, don’t make me tell you to go away, Will Ferrell.

7:07: And now I want to see … another goal line play on replay. Oh, never mind. 10-0 Pittsburgh. Yikes.

7:10: God, these are horrible. And, for God’s sake, Heroes is atotal ripoff of, and worse than, The 4400!

7:13: Arizona starts out pinned … and this re-whatever-the-fuck-it-is of Star Trek does look interesting.

7:15: Alright. Warner needs to establish a rhythm with the check-down options. And again. Once he gets in the saddle, expect a bomb to Fitzgerald in pretty short order.

7:16: Clearly, Arizona has decided that, fuck it, we threw all year. Who needs a running game to win a Super Bowl? (Answer: everyone, ever.)

7:18: One washed-up veteran completes yet another pass to another washed-up veteran. Yay, conventional wisdom!

7:19: And another drive is dismembered by a holding penalty. Ick. … Unless it isn’t.

7:20: Anquan Boldin, boys and girls. The Cardinals are back! Blowout averted, y’all.

7:21: What the hell was that? Well, maybe the least graceful TD pass in Super Bowl history. Looks damn pretty in the box score, though. 10-7 Steelers.

7:23: Hell yes. THAT is a Super Bowl ad! Props to you, cars.com. That was awesome.

7:25: That is way more analysis of footwork than is appropriate, in all honesty.

7:27: Geez, Wilson. Careful pal. Cromartie, meanwhile, bails them out AGAIN.

7:29: That play will be in NFL referee instructional films as an example of holding.

7:30: You … you don’t know what “flash” usually means as a verb, do you John?

7:31: What a return! Breaston is just exceptional … what a block by #92 there.

7:33: Mmmph. You gotta have better pocket awareness than that, Warner. You stepped up right into a sack. Gah. Looks like the return will go for naught in terms of points on the scoreboard.

7:35: Don’t make me close my account, E*Trade. Stop it. Seriously.

7:38: Solid punt coverage there. Beware dramatic disparities in special teams performance …

7:39: Fuck drinkability. Seriously. Arizona needs to avoid overpursuing or they’ll get burned.

7:41: Turnovers. Special teams … and turnovers.

7:45: Wow, did that screen pass ever get pulled out of their ass. Tim Hightower anchored my run to fantasy football mediocrity this season.

7:48: Another timeout. Go commercial barrage!

7:49: Very smooth delivery. Warner is in the zone.

7:50: It almost always amazes me when a WR screen works. They never look like they will.

7:52: Kill me. Kill me now. I need some whiskey. 17-7.

7:55: What a play by Harrison but … fuck. Not even the songsmanship of Bruce Springsteen is going to soothe this. Signing off for now …

8:22: Good job, Mr. Jersey. Bad job, overstock.com. (Carlos Boozer? A third-tier basketball player — and a liar at that — in a horrid ad.)

8:30: Alright. Pretty obviously, Arizona needs to put points up on this drive. Story of the first half: Luck giveth and luck taketh away.

8:32: Cardinals offense is in high gear, Pittsburgh. Get out of the way or you’ll get run over. Arizona will get their points. It’s up to their defense to make sure that the Steelers don’t put any more on the board. That’s where the game will be decided.

8:35: There is no way — NO WAY — that was a fumble. Horrible call. This baby HAS to be reversed.

8:40: Okay. Pittsburgh’s pinned back but … Arizona needs to maintain momentum. Desperately.

8:42: You knew there would have to be a Cuba Gooding sighting here.

8:43: Wacky formation there. Is that? … Yeah. Penalty on Arizona …

8:48: Seriously? That’s a roughing the passer call? Fuck. You get the feeling that Pittsburgh may have an undeservedly lopsided victory. They haven’t outplayed Arizona, outside of the first quarter, but it may look like a rout in the box score. If Pittsburgh puts 7 on the board here, I don’t think even the vaunted Cardinal offense can come all the way back.

8:53: They finally buckled down after … I … nooo. Are you serious?

8:54: Okay, guy with the “Go Steelers! Barberton Ohio” banner … you realize you’re dead when you step foot back in Northeast Ohio, right?

8:55: Oh DAMN. Should’ve gotten your hands on that, Rolle. But no.

8:56: One more stop? Yes! Okay. Now stand totally still on this FG attempt, you hear me? Alright. 20-7.

8:58: Really? Transformers 2? Mmmph. Monster ads, on the other hand, have been pretty good tonight.

9:04: Nice easy first down. Time to stretch the field vertically …

9:05: Fourth quarter time. Well, Super Bowl MVP looks pretty clearcut right now, right? It’s going to be either James Harrison or Kurt Warner.

9:09: Okay, the refereeing of this game is getting shaky. Current penalty tallies: Pittsburgh 2 for 15 yards, Arizona 9 for 91 yards. Do you really think the Cardinals are playing that much dirtier?

9:13: Yeah. Like I said. Another phantom call there. This is kind of a fait accompli at this point. Fucking Steelers.

9:15: Maybe not. The defense finally knocked Roethlisberger down. Mercifully nobody hit the punter, but Breaston was run over like a freight train. Ugly field position, but crazier things have happened here, folks.

9:17: Coke Zero ad FTW. Awesome. In other news, both Ed McMahon and MC Hammer really need your help, America. Please don’t make them appear in ads for Cash 4 Gold. Hell, is Ed McMahon really still alive, or was that CGI?

9:19: Hey, it’s Larry Fitzgerald Sr.! Who saw that coming? Okay, all of you. Whatever. Meanwhile, Kurt Warner is moving the ball and making it happen — or, in the words of Al Michaels, “working with alacrity.” It’s Super Bowl vocabulary time!

9:21: Nice swing pass to Arrington … then another good completion to Fitzgerald. Finally, a penalty on Pittsburgh! That last happened sometime in 1997. Too bad it was declined.

9:22: Using that timeout may come back to haunt the Cards. (Oh, wait. Pittsburgh called that.)

9:25: Well, you’re on the one. Two chances. And … touchdown! Yeah, that Fitzgerald guy is kinda good. We got a ballgame here. 20-14 … with plenty of time left.

9:27: Points for originality on the Hulu ad. Meanwhile, turning your Monday lineup into a musical is still disturbing, NBC.

9:29: So can you make the stop, Cardinals?

9:30: Well, it’s looking good so far. It would be awfully fitting for Arizona to pull a rabbit out of their hat to win it all, wouldn’t it? How else could this insane season end but with the biggest comeback in Super Bowl history? Here we go. Punt time.

9:32: So can you take the lead, Cardinals?

9:33: YES! McGruber! Yeah, I’m a nutcase.

9:34: Wow. Warner was 8 of 8 for 87 yards on the last drive. Put this guy in the damn Hall of Fame. And tack 15 onto that baby!

9:36: Breaston down the seam! Holy smokes!

9:38: Okay. Um, Warner? Calm the fuck down. Now here’s the problem: Two down territory or not? Do you kick a field goal?

9:40: No, you punt, but with 20 yards to go, the options are a bit short. Great special teams work but … ? And, um, Al? How is that huge? It ends up being a one-yard penalty.

9:42: Bloody hell. I am as much as nervous wreck here as I am during an Indians playoff game. Here we go, Cardinals, here we go!

9:43: Um, are you sure that wasn’t a safety? Because … that so totally was. You could challenge that … it’s not like you’re likely to have another controversial play in the next minute, Whisenhunt.

9:44: Fuck! Holmes with … Or not!!! Safety! 20-16!!!

9:46: Okay, guys. 64 yards for glory. Make it happen.

9:48: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *falls over faint*

9:49: No words … should’ve sent a poet … wowww …

9:50: Okay now. 23-20 Cardinals.  Now. Play. Defense.

9:52: He totally didn’t get that play off, but whatever.

9:53: Well. 1990s: horrible games, awesome ads. 2000s: awesome games, horrible ads. Make your choices accordingly.

9:55: Please, whatever happens, don’t let this go to overtime. Don’t let a coin flip settle this thing. Another catch …

9:58: Who’s 47 there? Damn. Well now we have a problem …

10:00: What the … what … I … there are no words. Damn it.

10:03: Yeah. It stands. 27-23. But you gave Arizona time …

10:04: … and do you doubt that it could happen? Honestly?

10:07: Fifteen seconds. Is there more magic in Kurt Warner?

10:08: No.

10:09: *sigh*

10:10: G’night.